Dotcom-crash CONCERN has flooded the markets in the wake of a global pixel shortage.

The LCInc stock index saw its worst fall since Monday with stock values plunging across Virtual Stores and e-commerce webzones on the information superhighway.

Flagellants’ processions have formed spontaneously throughout the Midlands, led by destitute financiers hailing the end of days, and locals with nothing better on.

Protective amulet futures are up 40% and nosegay bonds have climbed by a fifth as spooked traders have sought to move capital into safe haven investments.